Xmas Break 2017

School break is finally here after a long semester of weather interrupted (and elongated school days) learning. It's funny but every year the collapse into Christmas break is so anticlimactic as life suddenly slows and exhaustion catches up with me. However, unlike in years past, with Helena now, my vacation is her vacation, so there isn't really any vacation. I'll enjoy getting to hang out with her more, especially as she's a lot more interactive now. On the other hand though, I have a lot of things I'd like to accomplish over the break and that will not be so easy as Maya is also trying to get a big grant done.

Overall the past semester was fun and probably my best at Dunwoody yet. Having only one prep, my own classroom, no hallway lunch duty, and first period planning made for a winning combination. I also didn't have any truly "bad" troublemaker kids, which is something I am more worried about for next semester. I still had my daily heartbreaks and moments of clarity about what I am doing and how I make a difference.

Long-term I still have no idea what I am doing. Listening to all of the business-related podcasts (How I Built This, Start-Up, the Pitch, etc. is interesting but I don't know how much it's helped).  I really can't see teaching my whole life but I also can't see going back to school right now without more of a future vision. There's a lot of things I am interested in but nothing that's pushing me so much as to do something different and I like teaching and I like Dunwoody. I could go for a different commute though, that still kills me.

Being a dad has been fun and I think we truly got lucky with Helena. She's remarkbly easy, although as the photos below at times I lack concentration and revert to being on my phone rather than engaging with her. I am working on it but at times, especially on a weekend where I am in charge without help for long periods of time it can get a bit tedious. Sometimes I wonder about what to do with her and when I play with her how much is just her playing on her own vs. interacting with me.

I'll post again sometime during this break. Off to Florida for some (hopefully) warmer weather!

Southern, GA road trip Halloween weekend

Titus visit and all day long bike adventure through back alleys and all around ATL

Jimmy Carter Sunday School

Jon Ossof visit to Dunwoody

Maya annual holiday work party w/spread

Selfie at train yard on ATL bike adventure 

Southern road trip cotton fields

Marcos, Titus, Jeremy and co. at Cabbagetown annual's Chomp & Stomp weekend

Andersonville Prison

Farm de Tour bike ride w/Marcos

Southern Road trip stop over at the Pasaquan art complex

Maya taking a picture of me not at my finest - "negligent parenting" 

Backgammon w/Havi

Columbus Day 2017 Update

Another Jewish New Year gone by and my new time ticker reminds me it's been over 6 months since her birth. I'm having a great school year at Dunwoody with my first year of having only 1 prep. all year long, my own classroom, no 3rd period lunch duty, and relatively small classes. At least in this first semester I also don't have any real behavior problems. I can't tell if I've become a better teacher or if I've just gotten luckier this time around. Still trying to figure out life-work balance and spend more time with Helena.

No broad life revelations here but feeling pretty good about things. I've joined a competitive tennis league (doubles) and enjoying/feeling nervous about tennis again of course. The band has also been fun and we've found a way to continue playing pick-up soccer with a tag-team style to watch baby while we play. Life has changed but we are just as active as ever. I guess I gave up ultimate frisbee, but I wasn't playing before the baby came anyways. Starting to have to schedule more around Helena's schedule and not staying out as late these days but none of that really bothers me.

Lots of botanical garden ATL visits that we are now members

Quidditch in NYC during October Fall Break visit. Always crazy stuff happening there

Hiking at Harvestis in the Great Smokies, September, 2017

4th Atlanta United soccer game this year. New stadium has helped promote the team to 2nd place

Still manage to find a little time for Concrete Jungle volunteering

Peter Christenson and me holding up Maya's mushrooms on Harvestis weekend, a really good idea for seeing your good friends once a year and celebrating just because. Can't wait for next year, can't imagine it'll be as close as Pidgeon Forge

Place, Speed of Life, and End of Summer

The speed of life has picked back up as school has started back up again, Helena is in day care, and I'm back to the daily grind. Living in any city you sometimes forget about how much of a bubble you can live in. This is especially true in large cities or places like Atlanta with such a diverse demographic. 

I recently went to a teacher training where I was one of the few white males. They advertised teacher association discounts with companies such as Papa John’s, Popeye’s, & Dairy Queens while the crowd cheered. I tried to remember the last time I went to one of these restaurants. I couldn't remember although I recently did go to an Applebee's on a vacation where there were few other late night alternatives. NPR reported that Applebee numbers were down quite a bit due to millennials (like myself I suppose) who just weren't that into it. But back to the teacher meeting; I felt a little bit out of touch when I realized that I never went to these places, or even anything else like it while others applauded and cheered the discounts. Almost all of my friends though are more like me and can't imagine living in the burbs. A few of my friends have made that leap and lately I've questioned why I've become so urban focused now that many suburbs have nice walking areas and independent businesses I tend to patronize more. I could say that it's environmentally more efficient, more diverse, and more thriving from an arts and culture perspective, and those things are probably on the whole true, but we also pay much more to live in cities. 

Being back at school and once again dealing with 1 hour long drives sitting while stuck in traffic has me thinking about all of this again. In my case with the terrible commute even though it's theoretically a reverse commute, suburb life would make more sense. But I haven't quite come to grips with my identity around where I live, how much (if at all) it really matters, and what I want to do as Helena grows up, we consider having more children, and needing a bigger house.
 
The other interesting thing about many cities is how neighborhoods are oriented and we've become so partial to those neighborhoods. And the differences sometimes can be real with completely different demographics, safety (crime) levels, school quality, and grocery and commercial property proximities. But other times I think we become so micro-focused that that we lose sight of the bigger picture. For example, I recently got a pizza at a Midtown restaurant where the bartender and a customer talk about how much they dislike Buckhead and they commented that people in Buckhead really don't like Midtown either. While they are definitely different, they are much more similar than different than compared to a rural Georgia small town vs. anywhere in Atlanta. These same people hadn't even heard of East Atlanta Village (EAV), another popular Atlanta going out location. EAV is only 4-5 miles from Midtown but it caters to a very different crowd and I guess some people just stick to their small world and don't venture out into new or different neighborhoods. I like to think that I am a little more open to exploring different places (after all I'm a world traveler who's seen many different places and experienced many different cultures) but I know there are many worlds in Atlanta (like the underground rap scene) which I know nothing about.

https://youtu.be/deylxiiM9uE

Getting ready for Back to Memphis' Little 5 Point Gig, August '17

Summer hiking with Ben le Prof and Helena

Sherlock in his cool shades

Hanging with Marcos and family at the Sweetwater Brewery gig

At Ben Legow's wedding in Maryland, August '17

Murphy, NC eclipse totality 

Dupre 3000 Macalester roommates

Lighthouse near Sullivan's Island, Maryland on vacation

Yelp July Summer roof-top party in Buckhead

 Guatemala team reunion, last weekend before school started, at Isaac's house in the Poconos

One year ago from today

I found out I was going to be a father. It's kind of a crazy thought as Helena already feels like a such an important part of the family. Depending on how you feel about embryo's I suppose she already was last July as well.

The morning I found out about Helena, Maya messaged me while I was in New Zealand and told me we needed to talk. I assumed I was in trouble and had done something wrong as most men would in this case (it was 8 AM NZ time). But instead I was shocked, even though physically obviously I knew it was possible, finding out she was pregnant came out of left field. It had happened so quickly and since we weren't telling people right away I couldn't (or didn't want to rather) announce anything on this blog - specifically around the time of this post.

And then I was back in New Zealand, thousands of miles away, on an adventure WWOOFing, hitchhiking, sightseeing, and meeting a young 19 year old German named Max. Although we only knew each other for less than two days, it was a very memorable time. Max had convinced me to go on a winter hike to Brewster hut (see pic.) below even though I had almost no winter gear and wasn't sure we'd survive the night. He, like many NZ visiters (especially from Europe, of which there are many), was already an experienced winter hiker and assured me we'd be fine. While we didn't end up reaching the top of the mountain, we did travel a significant distance through some serious challenge. Once we reached elevation (after a hitchhiking adventure to get to the mountain), the snow was often several feet deep and even the gators I bought didn't stop the snow from getting in and freezing my legs. We made it to the hut and spent a night discussing life stuff by candle light and witnessing one of the most beautiful full moons I had ever seen. Thankfully, the pipe with the running water, so important at the time, thawed in the morning and we made it down just fine. Back at the road we said our fairwells and went our separate hitchhiking ways (which unfortunately involved several hours of waiting alone after he got picked up quickly going in the opposite direction).

Now one year later Max writes to me to ask if I remember him and to ask if I ended up naming our child Brewster- ha! I told him we hadn't but it was amazing to look back one year ago today and put my feet back in those icy cold snow-filled NZ boots. This is especially true in the two shower summer days of Atlanta where I currently exist.

Dead of Summer

Amazingly we've already arrived at the middle of summer and a friend today asked me how I felt about going back to school so soon and I was almost mad that she asked the question, that is until I realized that she was right. What happened to the three month long summers I seem to remember from childhood? Now I basically get two months - now I know most non-teachers out there would tell me to shut my mouth and stop complaining, but once you become a teacher you think about summer differently again. It's such a crazy ride during the school year and you really do put everything off until summer. I'm not even talking about big projects like refinishing the porch or getting a new dog, but simple things like going to the dentist, calling up an old friend, visiting a park you want to check out. And I'm doing some of those things, but I guess my list is long, time is passes more quickly than it seems at this point in my life, and I have a baby. And the big trips of summer are finished and I have a longer stretch here now to keep busy and enjoy life.

Taking care of Helena has been the majority of my focus this summer and it has not been a bad thing. Just the opposite really, I've enjoyed my time at home and while some days can pass by more slowly than others, she does cute things every day and I love that she has now started chuckling. Other days it can be frustrating when I want to get something small done, like mow the lawn, or research some product, and it can be difficult with the constant need to pay attention to Helena. I'd honestly probably have a harder time if I didn't know that at some point this would end and I'd be going back to work. It's not that I don't think I could be a stay-at-home dad, I'm just not sure doing that full-time would be intellectually stimulating enough for me.

We had a really great time in Denver and I can check two things off of my Colorado bucket list - Boulder (bizarro Burlington) and Red Rocks Amphitheater where we saw a fun 4th of July fireworks show in the horizon. Traveling with Helena has actually not been so hard and it's nice to be together as a family rather than alone with Helena while Maya is at work all day. PRK eye surgery was intense and took me some time to recover from (am still recovering really). I can finally see pretty well without any corrective lenses which is pretty amazing.

After finishing a lot of boring time researching appliances and finally deciding on those purchases I can move onto some other more exciting things with the few weeks I have remaining of summer. I probably need to start thinking about school year stuff too as I've not given that two thoughts yet this summer. Yesterday I volunteered in the morning with Helena at Concrete Jungle picking apples. Despite the heat of summer here, if I give up early enough (it's been a struggle getting up before 9 despite the fact that Helena usually sleeps through the night) I can do things with Helena and would really like to go on some hikes and explore more of ATL. Today I did an Audubon walk and pretended to be a birder.

Eating out at the Dashanbe Tea house in Boulder

Uncle Brad with Helena at the pro shop

Traveling Helena!

Brad and Rachel Wedding up in the beautiful CO mountains 

8 mile Beltline walk with Sherlock 

Red Rocks 

Golf with Brad after the wedding

Flatirons near Boudler

Keystone, CO

Stay at Home Dad

It's been an amazing last few weeks with the Helena family and friends traveling road show. We hit Boston, the Cape, NYC, and Vermont in our whirlwind tour, much of this captured on Helena's blog. We are now back in Atlanta and it's my first day of summer alone with Helena. Before she wakes up and my duties begin I want to lay out the game plan and reflect back on the last few months.

Overall early baby parenthood has been more fun than I thought it would be but it is still very hard work. I've also experienced a new phase of marriage where disagreements of parenting styles can sometimes lead to tension. I think this is fairly common and the difference of our gender is definitely in play too with this. One example, I know I should be more worried about safety of our baby but in general this is not something that doesn't keep me up at night.

It's been nice getting special treatment at airports, restaurants, and public places where people coo and caw at the baby. We can now greet other parents in the street, with children of any age, and not be creepy - so that's pretty cool too. And realistically, even with just a few months of experience under my belt, I have lot more understanding at this point of parenthood already.

So my biggest challenging coming up is focusing all of my attention on the baby and not trying to multi-task as I am want to do. I am interested in child development, particularly that of my own child, but I also have a hard time figuring out what I can do with her. Unlike children speak and communicate their needs, the direct feedback I get is based on facial reactions and gut instinct. The long-term effects of tummy time, nonsense conversations, playing Mozart or other classical music, or explaining & narrating my life for Helena are impossible to analyze in the moment. But I guess I should close the computer, turn off Netflix, and stop washing dishes or folding laundry at least some of the time and trust the science. It's funny but when you break it down with how much sleeping Helena does these days there's really very little "alert" time with her in a given day.

So a few ideas for the next 6 weeks with her and for myself, acknowledging that I may or may not accomplish even half of these things and I'll probably come back and edit this sometime in the next day or so:
Everyday stuff:
1. Learn (practice) Russian - goal -15-30 minutes/day
2. READ - 1 hour a day -> Atlantic magazine catch up from the year and Childhood development books and if I can get around to it since it's been ages, an actual book. I'd also like to find, buy, and read some French children's storybooks.
3. House Exercise w/baby - goal 15 min./day. Time to trim some of that stomach fat
4. Silicon Valley - 1 episode/day. Heard it's a great series. Looking forward to it.
5. Helena play time - tummy time, walks with Sherlock (not sure if I can count this here), conversations, swim lessons, and to be determined with the help of #2 reading and lots of Youtube videos.
Less frequently:
6. House projects - Need to research new appliance machines, fix fence, move/make new garden, outdoor shower (probably too ambitious with this last one).
7. School projects - French newsletter, Quebec and France exchanges, prep. for next year stuff, tennis tourney research
8. New tennis rackets/Keyboard research and purchase
9. Hike - Once a week
10. Ongoing house maintenance - dog walking, shopping, cooking, dishes, Helena blog, being a good husband and helping Maya, cleaning, laundry, etc.

Winter 2017, only time ice appeared that I can remember 

Landscaping with my dad's help after April 2017 visit

Sherlock in front of our actually "peaching" (can I use that as a verb?) peach tree after three weeks on vacation, June '17

Trillers to remember

Teacher vaca. weekend 2016 in North GA at Lake Hiawassee and then cabin nearby over the border in NC

https://youtu.be/yokgoy1zTEo boat rental

https://youtu.be/itfVzp45mDM dancing at the cabin

Triller Life testing in Palm Springs, Xmas 2016
https://youtu.be/vckosh99hcw

Time

So we are about one month into young Helena's life and things are going pretty well. It has been an adjustment and it's not easy maintaining a proper work/life balance even with Maya being off. It seems like I never have time to get anything done that isn't purely survival based. The I-85 bridge collapse has been awful. I think I may have, or should have, 20 minutes before work starts but then I get there just as work is starting or even late (for my first time ever to Dunwoody) because of the crazy traffic jams -as if Atlanta wasn't bad enough.

Lately, with tennis end of the year banquet, the French visiting, and lots of stuff going on at school, I'm often getting home after 8 with little to not time to hang with Helena. Sometimes, I'm just trying to get her to go to bed so I can do a little work, or so I can go to bed early but frustratingly none of those things happen. There's no predicting the babies reactions at this point and sometimes you can spend hours just trying to calm her down. It's tiring work and I am nervous for this summer when Maya and I switch roles.

Surprisingly (by definition also) Maya threw me a surprise birthday last weekend. It was really fun and nice to see so many people, friends I often don't get a chance to see anymore. It's especially impressive given how much attention Helena needs and for her to be preparing this party. It was a nice turn out with a crazy assortment of people in my life including Haig from Cameroun, Marc, the visiting teacher from France, old frisbee and soccer friends, teacher friends, neighbors, and others that we know.

This time of year is always hard, but just one month to push through until the end of the year. Thank God for weekends

Surprise!